Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
