White coat. Heels.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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