I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
