u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
false alarm, still single
Randomize