Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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