I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Dating After Heartbreak
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?