oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
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