this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
