Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Randomize
