4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
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