I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
