So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
