I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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