I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
That accounts for only three of the penises
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
