Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.