you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
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