Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize