Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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