so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
