we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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