three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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