Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
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