How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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