U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
