i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize