I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
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