maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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