I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize