I met the friendliest cop last night
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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