Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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