We're like a lot better than the average bears
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
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