Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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