It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
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