Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
