all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?