i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
