ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at about main and main street
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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