We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
