I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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