Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
