i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
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