it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
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