if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Randomize
