That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
