I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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