sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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