You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
