My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
