So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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