We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize