i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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